Nouwen: New Wine

Nouwen: Crushed Grapes make New Wine

“Sometimes our sorrow overwhelms us so much that we no longer can believe in joy. Life just seems a cup filled to the brim with war, violence, rejection, loneliness, and endless disappointments.

At times like this we need our friends to remind us that crushed grapes can produce tasty wine.” Henri Nouwen, Henri Nouwen Society, Daily Meditation, from Bread for the Journey, by Henri Nouwen, 1997 HarperSanFrancisco.

The Freeman Playground in Downtown Helena honoring the life of Freeman Ellis Staley who died in his 10th month of age

Our God does not promise that we will not experience sorrow or tragedy, but God does promise that God will be with us through our despair and that out of every Good Friday experience comes a resurrection, an Easter. When we, our friends, or those we come to comfort are in the middle of sorrow and pain, these words are not comforting. We are called at first to be the love of God just by our presence to those who grieve. There are not words to comfort, only our love and presence, which can be a healing presence.

 As the sorrow eases, we can slowly give this promise of an Easter experience where crushed grapes turn into wine. I see people whose son committed suicide develop programs for suicide prevention so that others will not have to go through their experience. I see those who have experienced the death of a loved one now be the first ones to reach out to others whose loved one has died and just go and sit beside them for hours.

Parents whose child has been killed in a tragic accident build a playground or a trail so that other children will have a safe place to go. A family whose teenage daughter dies in a car accident begins a program for the arts for teens in public schools since art made such a difference in their daughter’s life.  A group who develop a friendship in a grief recovery group develop a funeral team at their church to care for families before, during, and after the service.

 All of us are a product of our wounds. We have a choice. We can learn and work and live through our wounds and over time at some point experience another Easter and taste a new wine, or we can stay isolated and buried in our Good Friday tomb. My experience is that Christ stays there with us as long as it takes, ready to roll away the stone as new life emerges.

Joanna   joannaseibert.com

Easter Vigil Remembered

Easter Vigil 2

“How blessed is this night when earth and heaven are joined and man is reconciled to God.” Exsultet, Book of Common Prayer, p. 287.

I revisit this past Holy Week and remember some wonderful stories of the excitement of the Easter Vigil at each of the churches where I have served. I remember one priest telling us at his homily many years ago that our presence at the Vigil didn’t give us extra points with God for being there, getting more stars in our crown. It was simply a privilege to be some of the first at the empty tomb to meet the risen Lord.

One of my favorite surprises was waiting to see how the altar guild would often decorate my larger harp for  the Easter Vigil.

Many congregations then follow the Vigil service with an elaborate reception or dinner late at night at church or at someone’s home.

 Once at Trinity Cathedral as the deacon tilted the candle ever so slightly to light its wick from the first fire, oil ran out of the top of the candle and the fire became surreal, like the tongues of fire described at Pentecost.  At St. Margaret’s we did the Vigil in the Columbarium garden and I played a smaller lap harp as I sang the Exsultet to stay on key. I cannot describe the feeling of shouting out in the great outdoors, “The Lord has risen indeed!

At St. Luke’s one of my favorite lectors reading of one of the Old Testament lessons was having difficulty seeing in the dark in the middle of the long reading and put her candle closer to the microphone at the lectern catching the foam covering over the microphone on fire. She so elegantly blew the fire out and didn’t miss a beat in the reading. Also at St. Luke’s one of the amazing teachers of the children ministries and her two children planned a flashlight egg hunt for older children after the Vigil outside around the church which was a huge success as well as increasing the number of young people at the service!

The Vigil is so unusual, however, that it also is so easy to get caught up in the many tiny details of this once a year liturgy and view it as a performance rather than an offering. The Vigil is a service to be enjoyed and celebrated. We can always count on the Vigil to bring surprises just like the risen Lord.

Joanna joannaseibert.com

Easter Week Visits

Easter Week Visits

“For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39

Painting at Our Mother of Perpetual Help Parish

I talk with so many people who do not believe they deserve God’s love. I remember visiting with a very alert, highly educated woman in her 90’s still involved in her successful business who wanted to start going back to church but only after she got her life back together and felt like she was a better person. I told her the famous line that “the church is not a museum for saints but a hospital for sinners,” but she never returned.

I talk to many people recovering from addiction who feel so much shame for the life they have led. They do not see how God and others can forgive them. So many have been raised by a judgement God who is looking over their shoulder to catch them in sin.

I want to let them know that there is another way, those who believe in resurrection, an Easter, which always can come after a Good Friday life or experience. If I can, I remind them of Jesus’ disciples who abandoned, denied him. He did not return to them in that upper room on Easter evening and say, “Shame on you.” Instead he said, “’Peace be with you.’ When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them. ‘Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven.’” (John 20)

We talk about the difference between shame, “I am a bad person,” and guilt, “I did a wrong thing.” We also talk about addictions not being a moral failing, but a disease.

We talk about seeing any sign of God’s love alive and well, working in their life.  We pray that the Holy Spirit will led both of us to recognize the Spirit alive in each other, to see and be led by the Christ in each other. Sometimes I tell my story of how God has been present in my life through so many difficulties to see if they see any similarity in my story and theirs. Lastly, I may share the above mantra from Romans I used for several years as I became more aware of the harm I had done in my life to others and myself and was seeking forgiveness.

Joanna  joannaseibert.com