Mothers

Mothers

“On this Mother’s Day, we give thanks to God for the divine gift of motherhood in all its diverse forms. Let us pray for all the mothers among us today; for our own mothers, those living and those who have passed away; for the mothers that loved us and those who feel short of loving us fully; for all who hope to be mothers someday and for those whose hope to have children has been frustrated; for all mothers who have lost children; for all women and men who have mothered others in any way—those who have been our substitute mothers and we who have done so for those in need; and for the earth that bore us and provides us with our sustenance.  We pray this all in the name of God, our great and loving Mother.  Amen.” The Reverend Leslie Nipps, Women’s Uncommon Prayers, p. 364.

My mother and father when they were young having fun.

Sarah Kinney Gaventa wrote an excellent piece in GrowChristians.org called “Liturgical Trapdoors: Preparing for Mother’s Day” about how difficult secular holidays such as Mother’s Day and Father’s day can be for some people and how the church can compound their pain. Having all the mothers stand up at church can be painful for those in the midst of fertility workups. Those with painful childhoods also will have difficultly if there is a comparison to the love of a mother or father to the love of God.  So many people often come to spiritual direction for these very issues.

Gaventa offers this more universal prayer for mothers from Women’s Uncommon Prayers as a start. We know the love of God through other people, but when there is a stereotype for a certain person such as mother or father and ours did not fit that, we can become even more wounded when a comparison is made to our own parents.

Gaventa suggests we talk more about the feminine  aspects of God and Jesus. We can talk about their caring for us as a mother but not comparing it to certain mothers.  She also reminds us that Ann Jarvis, the woman who started the Mother’s Day movement during the Civil War was a peace activist. Perhaps some way of honoring all mothers might be to suggest an outreach project for peace where mothers would never have to send their fathers and husbands and sons to war.

Joanna  joannaseibert.com

Buechner, Jung, Murray: Synchronicity

Frederick Buechner, Patrick Murray, Carl Jung: Synchronicity

“I remember sitting parked by the roadside once, terribly depressed and afraid about my daughter’s illness and what was going on in our family, when out of nowhere a car came along down the highway with a license plate that bore on it the one word out of all the words in the dictionary that I needed most to see exactly then.  The word was TRUST. The owner of the car turned out to be a trust officer in a bank, and he found out where I lived and brought me the license plate itself, which sits propped up on a bookshelf in my house to this day.  It is rusty around the edges and a little battered, and it is also as holy a relic as I have ever seen.” Frederick Buechner, The Frederick Buechner Center, Frederick Buechner Quote of the Day, December 17, 2017, from Telling Secrets. pp. 49-50.

Frederick Buechner so beautifully gives us this story about synchronicity, or coincidences, or serendipity. Many believe this is an occasion when the unconscious speaks to our consciousness. How this happens is a mystery that Jung and Patrick Murray describe as “a relationship between an inner psychic experience and outer physical event.” A synchronicity is “a meaningful coincidence that contributes to one’s sense of wholeness.”

In spiritual direction, we talk about looking for times of synchronicity, the occurrence of meaningful coincidences, being aware of them and pondering them, not letting them just slip by. Patrick Murray calls these “moments of transformation, embracing us with a profound sense that life is ultimately purposeful.”  

We sense a holy connection. A friend happens to call just when we needed it. We turn on the radio and hear a musical piece that brings back pleasant memories of a time we heard the music when we were with a loved one or dear friend. We feel peace. There are moments like that every day if we just step out of our routine to be aware of them.

At our food pantry I usually stand in a certain place inside and talk to those coming by for food. Today we came a little late and there were people sitting outside already just waiting for their grocery bags after they had put in their order. For some reason I decided to go outside and greet people there. Suddenly I saw a friend I had worked with for thirty-three years who had lost her job. We hugged and she told me about her struggles finding another job. I saw courage and faith as I have never seen before. She had a plan and was not giving up, and she still felt very cared for by a loving God. For me, this was synchronicity that we saw each other and could support each other just for a few moments.

I will put this visit in the memory book of my imagination and hope to remember to be on the lookout each day for ways like this that the Holy calls us and offers to us an opportunity to share the Christ in each other.

Patrick Murray, “Jung’s Concept of Synchronicity,” The Haden Institute, December 2002.

Joanna joannaseibert.com

Strangers: Gratitude

Strangers

“Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it.” Hebrews 13:2 NRSV

Early in our medical careers as my husband and I were given the opportunity to help develop departments at Arkansas Children’s Hospital, we were constantly recruiting out of town physicians looking at positions in our specialties several weekends a month. We also had three small children whom we wanted to be with especially on the weekends, so we usually took our children with us on tours of Little Rock and lunches in the afternoon.  We often ate at a hotel restaurant that had an inside glass elevator and escalators, so when our children had enough recruitment entertainment at lunch, they entertained themselves by making several bird’s eye view trips up and down the hotel.  

 I don’t know if this term is still in fashion, but we would identify the visiting physicians to our children as “visiting firemen.”  The phrase is still a well-used part of our family vocabulary.

Many of these “visiting firemen” indeed were “angels unawares” as the King James Bible translates this verse from Hebrews. We had no idea how we would be able to work with those we were recruiting, but we took a leap of faith, and they changed and healed children’s lives, and influenced us as well. They helped us put out fires when politics reared its ugly head in medicine. They taught us by their presence how grateful we were for them every day as we tried to solve and identify and change the course of children’s diseases discussing and consulting with each other in community rather than making decisions by ourselves. Their presence and their wisdom changed me from an anxious person to a grateful person. They brought with them peace, one of the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians. (5:22-23)

The greatest accumulation of strangers with whom I now meet weekly are at St. Mark’s food pantry, but soon they as well are no longer strangers. Many indeed are angels. They ask for prayer, but they know how to pray so much better than we do. They have very little, but they share with others. Many bring their neighbors who cannot drive. Most repeatedly tell us stories about how blessed they are.

Perhaps, this is a sign of an angel, one who lives in gratitude.

 I share with spiritual friends that I have learned most often from strangers that gratitude is a straight path to our soul, the God within us.

Joanna joannaseibert.com