Laird: God's Presence/Absence

“Union with God is not something we acquire by a technique. Because God is the ground of our being, separation is impossible. God does not know how to be absent.” Martin Laird, Inward Outward daily quote, May 16, 2018.

Cannon Beach by Joanna Campbell

We may feel that God is not beside us or that we have been abandoned by God, but Martin Laird reminds us that God is never absent. Never absent. Never absent. We need to remind ourselves about this every day, every moment. We are never alone. The vastness of God’s presence and God’s love is greater than we can know or feel or imagine.

My experience is that when I start asking for more love from friends and family than they can give, this is a stop sign that I have become disconnected from God’s presence. I am asking others to give more love than they can give because I do not feel God’s love’s. When I talk to people in spiritual direction who feel estranged from God, I remind them of my experience.

So, how do we change? How do we feel God’s presence and God’s love rather than God’s absence? My experience is that we have become disconnected especially with the Christ within us.  There are a multitude of ways to try to put ourselves in position to know and feel that love of God that is always there. That is the purpose of all of the spiritual exercises. Some make gratitude lists.  Some try to be more intentional about their prayer time, spending more time with God, listening instead of talking. Some spend more time in Nature where God’s presence and beauty is overwhelming.

Another place we are told God is always present is among the sick, the poor, the needy, the lonely. My experience is that visiting those in need is one of the surest way to connect with the Christ in another who then reflects to us the Christ in ourselves that has been there all along. Working at a food pantry, visiting the sick, sitting with someone who is lonely is where we find God.

The paradox is that getting out of ourselves leads us back to the God within.

Joanna  joannaseibert.com

Nouwen: Love

Nouwen: Love

“Hope and faith will both come to an end when we die. But love will remain. Love is eternal. Love comes from God and returns to God. When we die, we will lose everything that life gave us except love. The love with which we lived our lives is the life of God within us.” Henri Nouwen, Henri Nouwen Society Daily Meditation, May 17, 2018, from Henri Nouwen, Bread for the Journey, HarperSanFrancisco. 1997.

a grandfather and two granddaughters who are graduating next week

As we grow older, we think about our legacy, what we will leave behind and what we carry with us. Henri Nouwen reminds us that what we take with us is love. I think that what we leave behind also is love. As I remember those who have died, I most hold onto and remember how well they loved. The honors, the prestige, the medals, the positions fall away. What seems to matter most is how they loved, often in face of great difficulty or with  a horrendous past.

I have recently met with a group of friends I have known for over forty years in my medical specialty at our international meeting. We often end up talking about those in our profession who have died. This is what transpires. We hear and share stories of how they were kind to others, gave us a chance when no others would, threw wedding showers for us when no family members could, asked about and showed concern for sick family members. Rarely do we mention the brilliant diagnoses they made. Instead we remember their kindness to us, to patients, and to those they worked with. We rarely mentioned the giants in our medical specialty who were so wrapped up in their own careers that they could never love or care for others. When we did talk about them, they were a reminder to each of us of the kind of person we do not want to be.

 I also remember those who love without conditions, not requiring anything back, loving no matter what happens. My experience is that this is most often the love offered by grandparents. This is a privilege that should not be forgotten.

Joanna joannaseibert.com

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Resentments

Resentment

“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”  Attributed to St. Augustine and many others.

So many people come for spiritual direction because of resentments of harms done to them by other people. These resentments block us from a relationship with God as we obsess about what this person has done to us, thinking about this injustice more and more. The person or the event becomes our higher power, our God.  There cannot be a relationship with God because so much of our existence is centered on what was done to us and how we can react or even cause harm to that person. My experience is that when I can calm down and have some realization that this person indeed has become my God, I attempt a pathway to forgiveness. I don’t want this person or situation to be my higher power, to take up so much space in my limited life.

 The first step is praying daily for that person. Praying does not change the person that harmed us but praying can change us.  

One other observation can be helpful. We do not have far to look to see others whose resentments for harms done to them have taken over their existence. Some try to hide it. Some openly live a life of resentment. It changes who they are. Anger, bitterness, self-centeredness live in that body. Wholeness is excluded. Some become almost paralyzed by the resentment and cannot deal with life on life’s terms. They in turn begin to resent others who do not appreciate the harm that was done to them. Addictions creep in as temporary harmful solutions to the increasing pain that the resentment brings. That person who harmed them is still hurting them. It is a very sad, isolated life, an icon of who or what we do not want to be.

Forgiveness is our only option if we want a relationship with God and a relationship with others.

Joanna  joannaseibert.com