Humility

Humility

“Do not imagine that if you meet a really humble man he will be what most people call ‘humble’ nowadays: he will not be a sort of greasy, smarmy person, who is always telling you that, of course, he is nobody. Probably all you will think about him is that he seemed a cheerful, intelligent chap who took a real interest in what you said to him.”

-C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity, inwardoutward.org, Daily Quote, October 2, 2018.

. Frederick Buechner in Beyond Words (pp. 161-162) also talks about humility as not thinking ill of ourselves but simply not thinking that we are more important than others. We are not more significant or less essential than our neighbor in God’s eyes. This definition of humility does not devalue ourselves but values ourselves and others on a same plane. The humble person is genuinely interested in others and their wellbeing because he or she also has a strong sense of self and does not need accolades from others to survive.

John McQuiston II in Always We Begin Again, his modernization of the Rule of Benedict describes Benedict’s twelve stages of humility. (pp. 39-45). If we are to follow the Rule and to have humility we are to realize the sacredness of each moment, to know that being guided only of our own self-will can lead us astray, to accept our limitations, to be patient, not to hide our faults, to be content, not to judge, not to be joyful over the problems, disappointments, and losses of others, and to speak gently and briefly.

Three writers from different ages keep telling us that humility is important in our life in community as well as in our own individual life development.

This understanding of humility is different from the trait that has often been described to us.

Joanna joannaseibert.com

Feminine Wisdom

Wisdom

To the disciples who were always asking for words of wisdom, the Master said, "Wisdom is not expressed in words. It reveals itself in action." But when he saw them plunge headlong into activity, he laughed and said, "That isn't action. That's motion." Anthony de Mello, Synthesis Today Quote, August 19, 2018.wwwsynthesispub.com.

Manet Fainting Couch

There is a Greek myth about Psyche and Eros that many people doing Jungian work use to describe the conscious development of women. The story is the basis for She by Robert Johnson and Till We Have Faces by C.S. Lewis. In order for Psyche to reunite with her lover, Eros, she is given several tasks. At the beginning of each task, Psyche collapses and weeps as she sees the task so insurmountable.

My image is Psyche lying on one of those old-fashioned fainting couches that every woman of means possessed with her hand turned palm up on our forehead, her eyes closed, and her head leaning backwards on or off the couch. It is the feminine body language of surrender and stillness. Instead of plowing directly into a difficult task she has been given, the feminine waits, rests. In the waiting, answers come that are completely out of the box. They are truly answers to prayer. Some would say the answers come from the Spirit of God within her. Help comes from places she never imagined.

This is wisdom, the action of waiting, stillness, especially before we are asked to do something we do not think we are capable of doing.

I remember waiting in an outer office before a difficult meeting with other physicians. At first I was upset that I, this important person, had to wait! Slowly I realized the waiting was a gift, wisdom from a mysterious source, a time to quiet myself, to surrender to the moment, and to be still before taking on a meeting that might be difficult. When I was able to do this, I often took into the meeting the feminine energy of staying in relationship that could make all the difference in what happened.

Joanna joannaseibert.com

Parker Palmer: Violence

Parker Palmer: Violence

“Violence is what happens when we don’t know what else to do with our suffering.” Parker Palmer, p. 48, On the Brink of Everything, Grace, Gravity & Getting Old, Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.2018.

I am not even one quarter the way through this recent book by Parker Palmer and already have most of what I have read underlined. I am especially moved by this quote about violence from a commencement address by Parker Palmer to the class of 2015 at Naropa University in Boulder, Colorado.

We daily see this in our lives. Violence comes from accumulated suffering that we and generations before us can no longer bear. Violence is grief that cannot find any other outlet or transformation. Maybe we have just inherited this way to respond to grief. Violence is grief over the loss of identify, loss of what we think may be ours, loss over loved ones, loss of land, loss of life’s work, loss of the rights that others have, loss of food, shelter, loss of love.

Grief is a powerful energy. I know it best in working with people in a grief recovery group, Walking the Mourner’s Path. Grief saps us of all energy. Grief takes up all our energy. We at times become paralyzed. When we are grieving, we can become violent to others, blaming them for the loss of our loved one. We can become violent to ourselves, becoming bitter, a victim.

There is hope, great hope. I have seen this enormous energy transformed into something other than violence. It can be transformed into empathy for others who are suffering as we hear their story. When suffering moves away from its own pain and reaches out to the pain of others, it becomes love. It can become compassion. Compassion leads to ways to move through the suffering, especially in community, that are nonviolent.

Suffering may not be the only factor in violence, but it may help to look at violence in ourselves and others and the world to see what part suffering may play in it. This involves looking at what must be going on in ourselves and others with some compassion when violence raises its ugly head.

Our faith stories teach us that finding love and compassion out of suffering can lead to resurrection experiences.

Joanna. Joannaseibert.com