“Living is not thinking. Thought is formed and guided by objective reality outside us. Living is the constant adjustment of thought to life and life to thought in such a way that we are always growing, always experiencing new things in the old and old things in the new. Thus life is always new.”
-Thomas Merton
When someone suggests that a person lives in her/his head, it is not usually received as a compliment. But the fact is, some of us do. It is part of who we are. It doesn’t mean we don’t experience emotions or can’t act out of compassion. It simply means that we like concepts, ideas, and that we usually seek explanations and connections. Some hint that this cannot be spiritual, and I completely understand. Yet, I want to make a case for the spiritual life of thinkers.
As a theologian, a large part of my life is spent thinking about who God is, how God is revealed, and how, as humans, we can relate, interact, and experience God. (You might think this last doesn’t happen very often, and perhaps it doesn’t, in the way of the mystics.) As a priest, I am privileged to preside at Holy Eucharist. While the experience may not enter the realm of the mystical, my experience is that when I say the words of the Great Thanksgiving, I find that each time something new or different emerges. And when I hold my hands over the bread and wine, I know that the gesture is important, but the work is God’s.
What I have come to know is that my trust (I prefer this word to the more common “belief”) in God is a life stance that cannot depend on whether or not I have certain feelings at certain times. Sitting in holy silence is not meant to please me, it is meant to acknowledge and worship God. Oh, I have had goose bumps from time to time at the procession, or in the prayers, or in serving the bread. I can’t explain it, and I can’t require it. My commitment is to doing those things that honor God and that, in itself, is the reward.
As St. Paul made clear to the Christ Community gathered in Corinth, our gifts differ, and there are different fruits of the Spirit. As a spiritual friend I try to help others discover and live out of the gift—or gifts—they have been given by God. This is made a bit easier as I accept my own gifts, and use them to worship God.
Larry Burton
