Healing our Hearts Through Forgiveness

Nouwen: Healing Our Hearts Through Forgiveness 

“How can we forgive those who do not want to be forgiven? But if our condition for giving forgiveness is that it will be received, we seldom will forgive! Forgiving the other is an act that removes anger, bitterness, and the desire for revenge from our hearts. Forgiving others is first and foremost healing our own hearts.”—Henri Nouwen in Bread for the Journey (HarperSanFrancisco, 1997).

Jennifer at last Cathedral School graduation

Several years ago, I was with an amazing group of women in Searcy, Arkansas, as we talked about forgiveness. One of the first questions from two women was, “How can I forgive someone who has harmed me or someone I love when they do not see they have done any wrong?”

These are the most complex hurts for me to forgive as well. We think we are doing fine, but then we hear how the people involved see no wrongdoing on their part, and an angry dragon rears his head again. This anger is nothing like our initial reaction, but still endangers our body, mind, and soul. We are allowing the people and the situation to continue to harm us—unless we can transform that energy into something useful for our body and the world.

I think of a small church-related school that I, and many others, were involved with that was closed overnight. After several years, most of us have worked through the disappointment and have moved on. We will all carry a scar, but for the most part, the wound is healing.

Most of us decided that if we cannot forgive those involved in the closing or those who did nothing to prevent it, they are still hurting us. They occupy space in our minds, lives, bodies, and relationships with others. We all have prayed to transform this hurt’s enormous energy into something positive. We are all now discovering gold—deep down below this pain.

I often go to a place where I remember the children, teachers, and school board singing and carrying small lighted candles through their tears as they walked out into the world, in pairs, at the conclusion of the school’s last graduation. What I cherish every day is the light that each of those involved at this school now brings to many other schools, homes, churches, and places of work. We have been sent out to share what we learned from that experience: the relationships, the love, the kindness to others, the acceptance of differences, and the belief in a loving God.

There was so much light radiating from that school. That is why it was so hard to leave. But now, we are commissioned to carry the light we received there out into the larger world. We can make a difference in so many other lives, and so many are doing just that.

Joanna  https://www.joannaseibert.com/

How to Practice What We Preach

 How to Practice what we Preach

“If mainstream Christianity has steadily lost force and credibility, I wonder how much might be attributed to that we preach one gospel and live another. We preach the Good Samaritan and lock our church doors. We preach the lilies of the field and allocate large amounts of our monthly paychecks to pension and insurance plans.”—Cynthia Bourgeault in Mystical Hope (Cowley, 2001).

Sunrise Light Out of Darkness

This is the old story of practicing what we preach. We talk one way, but act another. My experience is that much of what we do is unconscious. We see ourselves as good and caring people. We know a particular belief is part of our core values, but our society speaks against it or does not value it. This gives us excuses or wiggle room, so we don’t have to follow through.

My experience is that fear and the scarcity/zero-sum mentality most often keep us from being the person God created us to be. As a result, we cannot act on what we know at our core is true. We fear we will not have enough money. We worry someone will break in and steal what we already have. We fear our health will fail. We experience anxiety over the thought of being left alone and abandoned.

Being grateful, and expressing thanksgiving for what we have, is one of the best ways to journey out of a fear-based life. This offers us a daily reminder of how much God cares for us and loves us. When I am most fearful, I rise early in the morning and watch the sunrise as I acknowledge the fear inside of me and make a gratitude list of how I have been cared for. Out of deep darkness comes overwhelming light. God gives us fresh hope, a fresh start, each day. Resurrection comes out of the darkness when we have the courage to look fear in the eye and realize the blessings we have been given.

Living out of gratitude rather than fear can help us practice what we preach.

Joanna https://www.joannaseibert.com/

Daily Protection Prayer

Daily Protection Prayer

“May the guiding hands of God be on my shoulders,
may the presence of the Holy Spirit be on my head,
may the sign of Christ be on my forehead,
may the voice of the Holy Spirit be in my ears,
may the smell of the Holy Spirit be in my nose,
may the sight of the company of heaven be in my eyes,
may the speech of the company of heaven be in my mouth,
may the work of the church of God be in my hands,
may the serving of God and my neighbor be in my feet,
may God make my heart his home,
and may I belong to God, my Father, completely.”

—Lorica of St. Fursa (Fursey), 7th Century, Translation composite, from Facebook Page of the Rev. Dr. Frederick Schmidt.

Celtic Trinity knot

Fred Schmidt puts a prayer on his Facebook page almost every day. I cannot get this one out of my mind. St. Fursa was an Irish monk who was among the first to spread Christianity to Anglo-Saxon England in the seventh century. A “Lorica” is a protection prayer in the Irish Celtic tradition, often used before going to battle. It may have come from the original Latin word lorica, meaning breastplate or armor. It may have been inspired by Paul’s writing in Ephesians 6:11 to “put on the whole armor of Christ.”

As modern Christians, we can learn much from the Celts. We have a treasury of their wisdom, because writing and education were so important to them. On the other hand, I think of others who worshiped God, whose traditions we know nothing about because their experience—and not the writing—was primary to them. We need both.

This form of prayer should meet us as we wake up in the morning, maybe with that first cup of coffee or tea or even before.

We may need to return to it during the day, leaving a copy in a convenient place so we do not forget to put on “the whole armor of God.” Sometimes life seems like going into battle. However, my experience is that when prayers like this become part of our being, we recognize that the struggle is over and love has already won.

Joanna. https://www.joannaseibert.com/